Workforces are comprised of introverts, extroverts, and personalities in-between. The mix varies from place to place because the nature of a company’s work often shapes its culture.
For example, an aggressive sales organization tends to hire competitive extroverts. Methodical, detailed-oriented industries (such as engineering and accounting firms) often skew heavily toward quiet, skilled introverts.
It is never in a company’s best interest to be populated by clones. Clones share one point of view and are often late to change. Great companies tend to have multiple viewpoints (and personality types), which helps maximize opportunities and adapt more quickly.
In workforce demographics, different is good, not bad, and should be respected.
I do not like to categorize people but we need to generalize around these different approaches to life in order to compare contrasting recipes for networking success. For the sake of explanation, we’ll lean on dictionary definitions.
Introverts are shy, reserved people whose default focus is on themselves more so than others. Extroverts are outwardly expressive and mix more comfortable into new groups or situations.
Before continuing, I must point out that I am an extrovert. Some of my closest friends are not. We bond, I think, because of mutual respect. Extroverts know how confused the world would be if it were populated only by extroverts; we respect that introverts bring order, measured thought, and careful consideration to the extrovert’s world of energy, bluster, and enthusiasm. Turning the coin over, introverts know that as blustery and rude as extroverts can be some time, they also are good at connecting things and people. Each, to the other, has value.
Extremes are rarely good and often risky. For example, an introvert can become so internalized he or she becomes a recluse. For those who remember back 15 years, the nation’s most famous hermit, a bad guy named Ted Kaczynski (nicknamed “The Unabomber”), was arrested.
Kaczynski is in prison for life without parole but make no mistake: He is a brilliant man. Accepted into Harvard at 16, he earned his undergrad degree and continued his studies. He was awarded a PhD in mathematics from the University of Michigan. His career ascent was swift. At 25 he was hired to teach at Cal Berkeley.
Kaczynski quit Berkeley after two years and retreated from society. He moved to a remote and tiny self-built cabin in west-central Montana. Without electricity or running water, he tried to become self-sufficient. Societal frustrations and social isolation manifested into anger and destruction. He sent bombs, 16 in all, and soon “The Unabomber” was atop the FBIs Most Wanted list.
The Feds did not track down Kaczynski; his brother turned him in. He is now incarcerated in the SuperMax prison in Florence, Colorado. The prison is not too far from where I live; I pass it four times a year when I raft and fly fish the Arkansas River.
While Kaczynski is an example of an introvert gone horribly haywire, extroverts are far more likely to have destructive tendencies because of their attention-seeking personalities. Loud, bombastic, arrogant, “look at me” chest-thumpers typify their outward expressions that introverts (and many of the rest of us) abhor. Every day you can find a dozen of these headlining the news for all the wrong reasons.
Nearly all of us, of course, line up comfortably between the distant fence posts of these two extremes. We know and use our strengths, as well we should. For example:
- Introverts are often excellent planners and listeners with good intuitive judgments, clear goals, methodical with their research and preparation, and considerate of others.
- Extroverts have outgoing personalities with active interests that extend beyond themselves. Sometimes assertive, often gregarious, extroverts mix comfortably with others without fear of being thrust into a group dynamic.
As contrasting as these personality types are, they share a common, needy thread in business and life: the need to network. Networking comes more naturally to extroverted people; after all, it suits their approach and personality. But what about introverts?
Like it or not, introverts should network too. It’s healthy in real life, certainly. It’s also healthy in business, where connections create influence and opportunities and help boost careers.
Here are four things someone who is shy by nature should do in order to expand his or her ability to network comfortably:
- Use your gifts. Take inventory and build your skills into your plan. Research, strategize, and identify your end goal. Pinpoint your objective.
- Target your audience. Extroverts go into a crowded room and don’t care who they chat up. Introverts should be more selective. When I teach public speaking, I urge a nervous speaker to “find the happy face” before stepping up to the podium. The same holds true in a crowded room. Scout the room for happy faces. Approach those people; leave the sourpusses for the extroverts.
- Create a “world of one” with each interaction. Creating a “world of one” means devoting complete, undivided attention to the person you are speaking with. Nothing else matters — your entire world is tied to the eyes, expression, wants and needs of the person you are meeting. If you have ever fallen in love, you have experienced “the world of one.” Unforgettable, right? Two people sitting on a park bench for hours, talking of nothing and everything. The world of one is an introvert’s great opportunity for two reasons: People love being treated this way (and rarely are any more), plus it suits an introvert’s skill set. Want to make a fabulous impression? Whenever you meet someone, create a world of one.
- Strive for legitimate connections. Worry less about the sheer numbers of people you meet and focus more on being sincere with those you do. Let the extroverts worry about quantity; you focus on quality.
Cherish your uniqueness. Each of us has everything we need to make new friends whenever we want. All it takes is a smile, an outstretched hand, and a sincere and happy “Hello.”
Try it. It’s a wonderful way to live.