Years ago a friend of mine was struggling to deal with his son’s insistence on procrastinating about seemingly everything that mattered to the father. Putting things off that we can or should do is a situational malady almost all of us experience at one time or another.
There are five reasons for procrastination. Here they are, along with quick tips on how to turn this limitation to a strength.
1. We don’t know how. The size of our reluctance is usually tied to the size of the challenge. When something is new to us–especially if we are a creature of habit–sometimes the biggest barrier to success is that we are not sure how best to begin.
There are two ways to solve this, one being to figure it out on our own. The smartest thing to do is to break the goal down into small, doable pieces. When less intimidating milestones are easily seen, we’re more likely to take action because progress is identified and achieved more easily. Milestones fuel sustenance; we are refueled by successes small and large. Enough small successes produce a big one.
The second way to deal with a big challenge is to seek advice from multiple people whose opinions you trust. You might get lucky and find a coach who can teach a smart shortcut. At the very least, you’ll gain new insight. Both of these are encouraging steps forward.
2. We don’t have to do whatever we’re delaying. When what’s in front of us is a want, rather than need, it’s easy to keep putting it off. Wants are things that would be nice to see happen. Needs are different; needs require action.
For example, if we’re unhappy at work the idea of getting a new one can flitter around in the mind as long as we want. A new job is a want, not a need. Lose that job and the game changes. Now a new job is a need. We always have the ability to convert a want to a need, simply by redefining it that way in our own mind. This can be a quick and conscious decision, a pro-active commitment rather than a reactive response.
3. We’re scared to try. Fear can come from both failure and success. Because people are often scared to fail, doing nothing is a protective behavior. But huge success takes life into new territory too. With it can come new responsibilities, greater exposure, more stress, and a higher profile.
One of the biggest things I urge the people I coach to do is to chase what he or she is capable of doing in life.
Never short-change yourself. Push to go find out how good you can be; set your mind to finding out what that is you gave it your absolute, 100 percent best effort. This takes guts; if we only go 90 percent, we have a cushion in our mind — emotional protection — that says, “Well, I could have done it if I really wanted.”
Phooey on that. Ninety percent won’t cut it for a very simple reason. Way more than the 10 percent difference in effort is the emotional power and strength that comes from knowing you left nothing in the tank. It’s why champions are champions and not contenders.
Achievement introduces us to new people, personally and professionally. This is an interesting hurdle to coach through because so many of us have comfort zone barriers because of the way we were raised and the lives we’ve lived. Surpassing our upbringing is new territory for everyone who attains it. I love and admire people who do it. I am among their biggest fan and let them know it.
4. We need to enlist new resources beyond our control in order to succeed. New people can come into our lives whenever we want unless we prefer to live in a cocoon. A good challenge worth pursuing often involves strangers. Many of us are shy and find this uncomfortable due to a timid self-image. There are a lot more people out there willing to help than there are people who won’t. All great friendships start the exact same way. They all start with with, “Hello.”
5. We lack personal (or professional) ambition or drive. Let’s face it, some of us are lazier than others. Life’s a lot more fun when we’re making stuff happen than if we’re not.
Longtime Yankee owner George Steinbrenner died in Tampa yesterday. The Boss had a sign on the front of his desk that read, “Lead, Follow, or Get Out of the Way.” Leaders do not procrastinate, they make things happen. Followers take action too; they follow leaders and learn how to lead. They learn that they, too, can make things happen. No joy comes from getting out of the way.
But whatever you do, never forget King George’s slogan. When faced with something you can and should get done, make something happen. Figure out what to do and start moving. If you’re unsure, find a coach or mentor whose advice you trust and take it. As a last resort, get out of your own way. Life’s too short to waste a moment.
A life well-lived enables each of us to look back at what we’ve done throughout the years: the achievements we’ve had, the failures we’ve dealt with, and the impact we’ve had on others. A sadder life flashes back through what he or she could have done. If that’s us, then shame on us. We’re now stuck with the remorse that comes from selling ourselves short.
If it worked for Steinbrenner, it will work for us: lead, follow, or get out of the way. Encourage others to do the same.