Why Office Etiquette Helps You Get Ahead (part 2 of 3)

Office Etiquette, part 2 of 3

Interacting with Your Boss

“Manage your manager” through consistently smart interactions. This demonstrates business maturity and helps with smart career positioning for those motivated to someday lead.

Part 2 of this 3-part series shares tips for effectively interacting with the boss, the person best positioned to make you — or break you.

What to do:

1. Try to sense your boss’s many needs without pandering. These needs encompass a variety of  things like expectations, time demands, strategic planning, tactical planning, personal priorities, business priorities, branding, fostering teamwork, and pursuing goals. Anticipate his or her needs and help.
2. Understand his or her personal quirks and habits. We all have them; learn and respect the boss’s.
3. Utilize the boss’s preferred means of communication. You should flex to him or her; you should not expect them to flex to you. If they prefer live conversation, make it happen. If they prefer email, use it. Use communication tactics that mirror their preferred channels.
4. Wait until a meeting is over before leaving. Unless the boss ordains your dismissal, do not leave early. Doing so is a sign of disrespect. Leaving early says that your time is more important than his or hers.
5. Be friendly with the boss … but not too friendly. “TMI” (Too Much Information), especially the intimate sort, can backfire. Keep a line of distinction between personal disclosure and business prudence.
6. Keep the boss in the loop with regard to what you’re doing. Do not operate in secret. Secrecy builds doubt or, worse yet, mistrust. Transparency is good. Bosses like to know what their people are doing, especially when asked by their bosses.
7. Execute with discipline. Once given an assignment, follow up. Do not procrastinate or require being reminded.
8. Never — EVER — embarrass an employer, especially in public. Facebook and social media are becoming an action battleground because employees use it to rant about the organization that pays them. This is stupid, but people by the tens of thousands do it. Stick to higher ground.
9. Never use assertiveness, arrogance, or threats — either direct or implied — when interfacing with the boss. Cocky gets you nowhere but cut down.
10. When being coached or the recipient of constructive criticism, take it like a pro. Don’t joke about it or act defensively, just embrace it for what it is: a new perspective on how to improve. Be gracious and listen.
11. Vent privately. There is a phrase commonly heard in business: “Disagree without being disagreeable.” Plan your discussion ahead of time and focus on issues, not people. The best way to package your message is “positive, negative, positive.” Say something nice, introduce the negative issue that’s bugging you, and finish with a positive statement. Focus on behaviors, not individuals. Focusing on individuals is an attack. Attacks are toxic. Seek a private audience, explain what bothers you, and why. Do not be surprised if you are better at this than the boss. Bosses sometimes hide behind titular power rather than practiced skills with difficult conversations.
12. Never complain about a problem unless you can offer at least one positive solution.
13. If compelled to ask for a raise, build your business case first. Calculate your value proposition and write it down. Present your case in private and ask the boss to support your argument and champion your request. Each of us has a direct — plus an implied — value proposition to our company. If you are easy to replace, your value prop is less than a rainmaker who outproduces all others. Money deserves a business case. Write it down, study it, and present it.
14. Be prompt. Bosses love punctual people and are annoyed by those who don’t respect others enough to be where they are supposed to be when they are due to be there. There is only one reason for being late: You didn’t leave early enough. Eliminate tardiness from your personal brand.
15. Show you care. Show you care about your work, your team, your boss, and your organization. Bosses really appreciate those who are engaged and proud of what they do.

What NOT to do:

1. Don’t whine. To a boss, a whiner sounds like fingernails on chalkboards.
2. Do not complain about co-workers. Have an issue with someone? Work it out! The boss is not a referee, nor is he or she a babysitter. They have a business to run.
3. Never build your case for a raise around why you need it: you bought a new car, want a nice vacation, joined a club or organization, etc. Why you need more money is unrelated to your value proposition at work. Your value is what benefits your bring to the company minus what it costs the organization to have you.
4. Eliminate the words “Can’t because” from your personal brand. Live in a world of “How can we?” Bosses do not need subordinates telling them why things can’t get done. What they need are subordinates with ideas on how they can get done. This, to me, is a signature difference between the generations. Gen Y and Gen X employees are much more likely to innovative new methods than older workers who operate in a reflexive loop of behavioral predictability.
5. Never tell the boss you’re hung over or too tired. He or she will (correctly) assume you cannot manage your behaviors to an acceptable professional standard. Big black mark here …  so don’t do it.
6. Avoid the champion CYA (Cover Your Arse) of all time: “But I emailed you on that last (pick one: Friday, week, month, etc.).” Maybe you did, maybe you didn’t. If they need it, provide it.
7. Do not blame people or things. For Pete’s sake, take ownership! Blame is a buck-passing excuse. It gains no one anything at all. The stature of the blamer is diminished and the problem remains unchanged. Do not blame. Take ownership and focus on the fix!
8. Do not say things behind someone’s back that you would not say to his or her face. This cheapens your stock and causes the listener to draw an inescapable conclusion: If you talk about others behind their backs, they’ll talk about you behind yours. Bosses detest this because character assassinations boil team chemistry. Do not do it, and reprimand others who do.
9. If you don’t know the answer say, “I don’t know.” Bosses don’t want to hear stories, excuses, or gobbledygook. They want answers. When asked a direct question, answer it. “I don’t know” is a fine answer, if it is the correct answer.
10. Don’t slack. I coach organizations that workforce talent pools predictably fall in a bell curve. High performers are always great, year in, year out. Mediocre performers are parked in the middle of the bell curve by comfort and choice or because it’s temporary as they work with determination to improve. Ambition propels effort, expectations, results, and responsibility. Bosses love that. Good ones will help a motivated talent move onward and upward. Slackers are different. Slackers are hard to care about.

The first responsibility of every employee is to earn his or her paycheck. The second responsibility is to help the boss succeed.

The worst job in business is front-line manager. A few are great at it, some are good, but most are mediocre or worse; here again the performance bell curve comes into play.

Rather than argue or whine about the boss, help the boss. Do that … and everyone benefits.