People can get so knotted up dealing with crowded heads that sometimes they lose track of Marie Kondo’s advice concerning material possessions: de-clutter.
Head noise often involves a suitable dose of anxiety or remorse. Whenever your head gets crowded, pause from juggling the chaos long enough to identify if you are feeling either one.
- Anxiety is caused by thoughts swirling around what might happen. These tie to future possibilities.
- Remorse is caused by regrets over something that has happened. These over-the-shoulder second guesses deal with past events.
In both cases, the worries they cause are uncontrollable. We cannot control the future, nor change the past. Worrying about either burns negative emotional energy but yields no reward. In other words, why do it?
Rather than stew in anxiousness, sort through actionable activities that might better position yourself for success.
Rather than wallow in remorse over unchangeable history, focus on today and tomorrow. If there is a lesson learned, own it and apply it. If there is an overdue-apology your pride has prevented you from making, overrule your ego and make it. If neither of those is possible, commit a random act of kindness to make yourself and the recipient feel better.
I am fond of saying that, “Just because someone (or some thing) has access to your mind does not mean that he, she, or it has the right to be there.“
When anxiety or remorse pulls up a chair in your mind’s living room, don’t let it get comfortable. Ask it to leave. Neither serves a positive purpose, and a positive purpose is the price of admission we always charge in order for something to enter between our ears.
Own what’s in your head. If it belongs, let it stay. If it doesn’t, kick it out.
Ocean Palmer